December 16, 2004

Bad Writing

The Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest

It's the end-all of bad writing contests: the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest. One starting sentence, honed with cliches, insertions, and meandering thoughts until it's just right. "Right", in this case, being "the most absurd sentence you've read in years."

This year's winner was Dave Zobel, with the following:

She resolved to end the love affair with Ramon tonight . . . summarily, like Martha Stewart ripping the sand vein out of a shrimp's tail . . . though the term "love affair" now struck her as a ridiculous euphemism . . . not unlike "sand vein," which is after all an intestine, not a vein . . . and that tarry substance inside certainly isn't sand . . . and that brought her back to Ramon.

Entries for this year's contest are due April 15th... approximately. They'll take them until June 30th, evidentally.

Posted by Ted Stevko at December 16, 2004 03:40 PM | TrackBack